Friday 12 May 2017

If I had Wings poem

In Ruma Rima everyone did the "if I had wings" poem we had to do the 5 senses smell, hear, see, touch and taste. this is what I did

If I Had Wing
If I had wings… I would go to the sun and hope it doesn't burn me. 🔥🌞🐦
If I had wings… I would taste the clouds that tastes like chocolate cake with candy floss icing and with jelly on the top. 🎂🍮🍬
If I had wings… I would touch the moon and see if it’s warm or cold. 🌙⛸🌶
If I had wings… I would listen to the cow jumping over the moon going MOOOON. 🐄🌙🐮
If I had wings… I would smell the stars and hope they smell like candy and jelly. 🍮🍬🌟


-Brooklyn
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4 comments:

  1. Anonymous30 May 2017 at 12:20

    I like your writing and you blog

    ReplyDelete
  2. Miss B (Principal)30 May 2017 at 19:24

    I like the way that you have illustrated your poems. To make your poem more powerful and interesting for the reader, think about the verbs that you have used. For example jumped - think about how the cow goes over the moon. Does the cow soar? bound? leap? Each of these words puts a different picture in the readers' mind.

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 September 2017 at 12:15

      Thank you, next time I will try to use better words

      Delete

Thank-you for your positive, thoughtful, helpful comment.

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